Sunday today begins story week, but first I have something on my mind I'm gonna blog about, you know just to get if off my chest. One of the hardest things in life is having words on your heart that you can't say. So I am gonna say it
The moments in life that are the hardest. The moments you just wanna give up. The moments you can see the end coming, and you seem to always say to yourself, I didn't see this coming or This isn't what I expected. Something like that. Well I always think I didn't imagine it like this. I always picture moments in my mind before they happen, and most of the time the way things turn out aren't even close to the way I imagined them. That moment when you picture everything in life crashing down on you, when you think can I handle the pain? When you ask yourself what do I do? But you really have no answer, and honestly you aren't really sure if you want an answer. You aren't really sure if you want to keep fighting anymore. Those moments are the hardest to go through. Whether or not things really do end, the moment you can picture it in your head, that's when the pain starts to hit, and those moments are the ones that tear you apart. These moments seem to come when you least expect them. Which always seem to make it ten times worse.
Ok enough about that, it was kinda depressing. On to the story..
Speaking of moments that you think of the end I will tell you the story about my first car... Buddy.
It was a warm April day when we met. He was lipstick red, had a spoiler and a cute little dent in the passenger door. He was a 1997 Honda Civic EX. He had more character than Bugs Bunny. His engine roared like a quite lion, and his windows didn't like to roll down very fast. He didn't get his name until after a month or two of driving me around everywhere. It wasn't until I told him all my issues and would just go to my car and vent and feel better. I'm not sure if that's weird or not, but I didn't really have anyone else that made me feel better. Then one day I called him buddy, and it stuck. He was my Buddy, I told him everything, and he always listened, he never laughed at me, and he always made me feel better. Well it was a warm September day, I was driving down a back road on my way to the store to pick up some pictures I had printed when it happened. Speed limit was 40 and I was going down a hill, in the middle of the hill was a road that crossed through, they had a stop sign but I didn't. Before I knew it was coming a big white truck slammed into my driver door, the monster slid down Buddy pushing us into the curb and throwing us around. Buddy rolled to a stop, as my life flashed before my eyes. The driver door was pushing into my hip as my head pounded. I could hear Buddy groan in pain. I couldn't get out of the car to see the damage. But I could feel that Buddy was fading fast. After a long wait at the hospital and a lot of pain killers, nothing could take the pain away of losing Buddy. That was a moment I will never forget. I love Buddy.
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